Hate & Revenge

     I just spent an entire 30 minutes to put 7 pieces of paper together. The papers were torn into pieces. It felt like I was playing puzzles.

     Alright, that's not the main issue here. Main issue is what is written on those papers. My youngest sister was teasing her friend that that girl liked this one boy. That girl took it serious and went up to the point where she wrote, 'I HATE you to death, I'll not forgive you and don't you ever try to talk to me again. One day, I'll seek REVENGE on you for teasing me.' She even had the time to prepare a booklet titled, 'My Report,' which is full of harsh words.

     Wow, I'm surprised! And I wonder what the parents teach her at home. I'm neither a parent yet nor do I have any experience in raising kids but I seriously recommend every parent or future parents to teach kids proper way to make friends, to be friends, to teach the kids to not hate or seek revenge on other kids and to not play around with the words, 'falling in love with a boy or a girl' while they are still in school. Puppy love, popcorn kind of love doesn't guarantee you a bright future. Education does. Also, parents should choose the right shows and materials for the kids to read, watch and listen. Kids, they are like white cloth. Parents are the responsible people to colour that cloth. A bully will not be a bully if the parents teach and give him or her proper attention that he or she needs.

     I remember back then, when I had misunderstandings with friends, we had never seek for revenge on one another. I had never received any letter written, 'I hate you and one day, I'll seek revenge for things you did to me.' Never. Not even once. I went to 5 different schools. I'm grateful that my parents reminded me time and time again, 'to be friends nicely, to not pick up fights that may affect my studies and to not play around with the words 'falling in love with a boy' while I was still schooling. They also gave me freedom to watch any shows but let me know my limits. Hence, till today, I'm very selective of what to watch and when to watch TV shows. I'd only watch if the production quality, script, lessons behind, actors or actresses, plot, sound system of that movie or drama are worth to watch. Don't be surprised if I tell you, till today, I somehow, do not know how to switch on the TV properly. I had to ask my sister to help me with that. I know how to adjust the volume and change channels. That's it.

     Yes, I read novels - love stories (you know those from Alaf 21. Those that considered as romance novels, yes those novels) since I was 12 but not even once I took it as a reason to not excel in my studies. Yes, when puberty hit me, I started to like boys and had this imagination of getting into relationships (that was the time when I did not understand why is dating haraam in Islam - people told me it gets you near to zina. What if I don't do things that lead to zina but still dating, is that even haraam ? I had so much questions until a shaykh told me last week - dating is haraam and if parents know that the kids are dating, the parents are considered to be dayooth. That struck my mind and my heart), I received presents and surprises from boys but not even once I took it as a reason to pick a fight with a friend and to not score in my exams. I took it as an inspiration, as a challenge for me to pass with flying colours in every exam that I sat. Cause if I ever took those as reasons to not do well, my parents would definitely scold me at home for playing around when all I should do was to study and behave properly when they weren't there to see me.

     Just sharing from what I gained from the talks I attended before; proper Parenting Course is definitely good to attend. Fees shouldn't be an issue for you to gain knowledge, for you to learn to be better parents. Your children are amanah from Allah. Don't get married, make babies and give birth to your children for the sake of channeling your sexual desire in a Halal way. Marriage is an investment, a hard work, a struggle, a union of two souls, two hearts and two families for you to achieve your ultimate goal that is His Heaven - Jannatul Firdaus. Time to instill more love in kids and in ourselves so that this Earth will be a peaceful place to live. Till then, Thank you.

Two of my best friends that I knew since primary and secondary schools. Alhamdulillah for I've been granted with friends like them.